Happy Easter

It was an amazingly beautiful day for Easter this year :) We had fun playing outside at Nana and Papa's house and doing a treasure hunt for Easter eggs that Papa did for the kids :)

 My kids just love each other :)

 Or they just like to torment each other :)

 Papa is always so clever on what he comes up with for the kids to do!!!

 And umm....yeah this is me bored on the porch haha :)

Life keeps going :)

Nothing too exciting has really gone on lately in our house but here's a few pictures of our crazy life :)

Vanessa has developed an obsession with Taco Bell, her bootie isn't appreciating it....THANK GOODNESS Volleyball is starting soon haha

I decided we needed more room for road trips, so we traded in my car and got this :) OMG it's so much fun to drive hehe the salesman guy was ummm.....yeah he was hot!!!!

Vanessa (my lil zebra) decided to ya know lay in the middle of the floor in the kitchen while I made her dinner...which happen to be noodles and french fries....I tease her she eats like a prego woman ;)

It's starting to be flip flop weather again!! At least in my mind it is haha

My lil man on our way to the dentist to lose a few teeth...

Apparently he has a "small" mouth haha yeah MY kid having a small mouth funny I know :) But he didn't have enough room in his mouth for all his perm teeth so Dr Smith knocked him out and yanked the 4 teeth he was finally getting in from the last ones Dr Smith pulled haha The tooth fairy was BROKE after this one!!!

So I got Matthew some movies for after getting his teeth pulled and went to return them and happened to come out with this....Vanessa decided she's a family of one so she got all the family size food, I got the magnum bars....SALTED CARMEL magnum bars!!! WHAT?!! yeah I thought I died and went to heaven....yes they are AMAZING!!!! And Matthew got the ice cream cups haha :)

Forgiving....

This is kinda a post I have been thinking about for awhile and working on achieving for myself. Might be blah and boring or some might think I'm crazy (heck I'm sure we all KNOW I'm crazy) but I have come to realize that holding on to things from my past do nothing but weigh me down and keep me from moving on and being happy. Trust me, at times it has felt easier said than done and it has taken me a long time to be able to actually do this. As most of you know, I have been married, let's say a few times :p I don't regret any of my marriages or relationships I have had. If you would have asked me 15 years ago would I have thought this is how my life would have been? I would have laughed in your face and told you, you were crazy for even suggesting my life would turn out like this!! I would have thought I would still be married to Jared, this year would have been 15 years that we would have been married and probably had a couple kids. But if I hadn't gotten divorced from Jared I never would have made the second best mistake which was marrying Matthew's dad so that I could have Matthew. The next one not too sure about haha I admit it was the accent that made me decide to marry him 15 days after meeting him  :) Then there was Bryan haha I fell in love with his kids from the moment I met them. I realized the other day it will have been 5 years since we got divorced and since I've seen his kids last. I was angry at Bryan and his new wife Debbi for a long time but I realized they have moved on and are happy so why should I hold on to my anger! I sent her an email apologizing for my behavior and that I was really happy Bryan met her and she was their for his kids. Not a day has gone by that I haven't thought about them and missed them. My phone still goes off reminding me when it's one of their birthday and yes I have stalked her blog so I could keep up on how the kids were doing. They have all grown into amazing kids and I absolutely LOVE his new wife (ok 5 years ago new wife but who's counting) Her and I talk all the time on facebook and she keeps me updated on the kids which I so appreciate. The funny thing is, they might be over this direction this summer and we might meet up so we can see the kids for a day!! I am so excited if it actually happens!

A couple years ago I also apologized to Jared because I realized I didn't try and hard as I could have in mine and his marriage also. I was 18 years old, I had no idea how hard marriage was. It is something you have to work at every single day and keep working at it even when it get to the point you want to throw the towel in and find someone new, but when you find someone new those same issues will still be there, maybe a little different then before but in reality they are the same issues just a new person to fight with. Granted not all marriages are able to be fixed or one wants to keep trying and the other has given up. All I know is I have made a lot of mistakes in my life but I wouldn't change any of them for the world....every mistake and every wrong choice I have made has brought me to where I am today and made me who I am. Yeah I totally could have done without some of them haha but hey at least I appear to have survived them!

I don't want to be a person who holds on to things from my past and uses them as a crutch or excuse for who I am or why I am the way I am. You can't go back and change things but you can make the choice to not let your past dictate your future. I want to be a mom my kids look up to and know I am happy. I don't want them to see me holding on to things and letting those things keep me from being happy and living life with them because they will grow up to be that person also and I would hate for that to happen! Life is too short to let things hold you back and not laugh so much you pee yourself!!! I absolutely love my kids and love to hear them laugh and tease each other and me. They both have the best personalities (I'm sure they get that from their mother!!) but I see so many kids that don't laugh and they take life too seriously. When I hear my kids laughing and singing and being goofy I know they are happy. When I was married last, there wasn't laughter and goofiness in our house, there was silence and I hated that. A home needs to be where your kids can be themselves and have fun :)

Now that I have rambled on way too long I will now shut up haha ;)

Happy Birthday Vanessa!!!

I still can't believe my baby girl is 14 years old already!! She has grown up into such a beautiful young lady, I can hardly believe it. She came and climbed in bed with me Saturday morning and I started singing Happy Birthday to her, which she quickly asked me to stop singing haha :) She then requested me to get out of bed and make her breakfast...

 She took the whole pan and I got cold cereal haha ;)

I had asked her what she wanted for her birthday, she said to go shopping, so that was the plan for the day....SHOPPING!!! On the way to pick Nana up I decide she needed to try driving haha yeah not sure what came over me, but she got a panicked look on her face and said "WHY?!?!" lol

We decided on going to the SouthCenter Mall because it had all the stores she wanted to spend her small lil money roll...

For such a small bag, it sure cost a lot haha

She managed to spend all her money :) We had so much fun shopping but OMG exhausted by the time we were done!!!

We then headed to meet Papa and Matthew for dinner at Red Lobster of course :)

She had fun flirting with our cute waiter!!

When we got home, she wanted to try on some of her outfits :) She loves clothes!!!

 I love this girl :) She is so dang cute!!!!!!!

Sunday, we had Janet, Justin, Nana, Papa and Pinky over for dinner and Ice Cream cake....such a fun weekend for such a beautiful birthday girl!!!!

I just absolutely LOVE my kids to pieces!! I am so glad our life is getting back to where we had it before!! We have so much fun together....I LOVE his smile!!!! He's so stinkin cute!!

I absolutely love this girl :) and this picture, can't believe my baby girl is going to be 14 on Saturday!!! She is one of my best friends....

Love awkward moments...

I know I haven't posted anything in awhile, but honestly we have been busy getting sick and then recovering from being sick and just getting back into the swing of life again :) Promise I'll try and do better!!!

BUT I had a few awkward moments today I just couldn't pass up posting :)

Awkward moment #1: I had a doctor appt today and I walked into the bathroom and this was in the middle of the restroom haha I kinda looked and it and had one of those "huh?" moments, I was just glad they didn't tell me I had to use it cause that just would have been even more awkward and a bit uncomfortable haha

So I got past the acrobatic apparatus in the bathroom, did my thing and then was brought back to a room, a speedy ultra sound and then asked to sit in the chair and wait for the doctor to come in. So as I'm sitting there I glance over and this was staring right back at me.....

Of course I couldn't resist taking a quick picture before the doctor comes in :) So after yet ANOTHER surprise speedy girly check I get dressed and the doctor comes back in and sits down and starts writing something on a piece of paper and I'm looking at Pinterest on my phone, he all the sudden looks at me and says I like your shoes by the way! I look at him probably with this dumb founded look on my face and say uhhh...thank you? He smiles and says bet you didn't think you would hear that when you come to the urologist did you? I kinda laughed and said ummm...nope :) He laughed and said I'm kinda a shoe guy LOL

December....

Where do I even begin....so many things have happened and changed in the past month!!! If you hadn't noticed from either Facebook or from the changes on the blog, Nate and I are getting divorce. Which is for sure a good thing. Sad that the marriage didn't work but I am excited to see what life with bring my kids and I :) We had a great Christmas!! Matthew helped me make sugar cookies....cause it just isn't Christmas without sugar cookies!!!

 My lil baker :)

 He said if I took pictures of him he could take a picture of me haha

 My kids ACTUALLY listened when I told them they weren't allowed downstairs until 8:00am!!!

 This is gonna be a photo dump haha

 She saw the Victoria Secrets box and got the biggest smile on her face :) Santa is a smart man!!!

 Santa got it right with Matthew also :) He was so excited to get a bow and arrow!!

 Matthew is a Lego junkie at the moment :)

 Vanessa LOVES her new jammies :)

 She is so stinkin cute!!

 What Zebra print jammies wouldn't be complete without a scarf haha

 Matthew LOVES American Eagle!!

 Vanessa was so excited for her Coach perfume she got!!

 I personally thought this was absolutely gross....an alien autopsy kit that is edible!!! GAG

 No she's not taking her shirt off haha she's putting her new shirt on :)

 Matthew got just a few shooting devices for Christmas that Vanessa kept getting hit with haha

 She was so excited for her wrapping paper rolls she got from Matthew!!!

 Good thing there were Justin Bieber posters hidden inside!!!

 Yet another thing to shoot his sister with

 Good thing she takes a million pictures of herself to fill the frames up!!!

 I put Vanessa's name on this present so Matthew wouldn't figure out what it was :)

 We had air hockey wars the rest of the day!! I ended up with a busted blood vein on my finger and a bruise haha we get a lil into our games!!!

 Aftermath of Christmas!!!

 Vanessa sitting in her room with some of her Christmas presents laid out around her :)

 Vanessa got make up for Christmas haha she had fun posing for me after I showed her how to wear it!!! Love that girl :)

 MY Christmas present from my dad :) He is such a talented man!!! Totally finished off my kitchen :)

 I forgot to take a before picture of the dresser before I started, but here is the after picture of it :) LOVE it!!

We had a GREAT Christmas :) busy but it was good. The kids and I went shopping for new furniture for the living room......before :)

 After :)

New Year's Eve, the kids and I enjoyed our new couches and watched tv and played games...

 Matthew got a game called Fibber :) I think it should be called put these glasses on and look like a nerd!!!

 My beautiful children!!

 haha love these kids!!

 I think Vanessa was a bit of a fibber!!

 Yeah I make these glasses look good hehe

 :) these are our sexy faces!!!

 so many choices, so little time :) her energy food to stay up all night!!!